Individual & Family Relationships
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Course Introduction

 

Core Standards of the Course

STRAND 1
Students will explore the connection to Family and Human Services Careers.

Standard 1
Students explore the National Council on Family Relations (NCFR).

1. Using CFLE- NCFR.org
   
2. Identify the differences in careers in human services.
   
   • Prevention approach: Fields: extension, coaching, education
   • Intervention approach: Fields: social work, psychology, marriage and family therapy.

Standard 2
Discuss the importance of balancing work life and family life.

Performance Skills
Students will explore careers within the human services field. Identifying the skills needed in the career, education, career outlook, salary, and day to day responsibilities.

STRAND 2
Students will assess personal identity, will being, values, strengths, and needs.

Standard 1
Explore personal identity.

1. Explore how thoughts, emotions, and behaviors can shape identity.
   
   • Self-concept: How you view yourself and the world around you.
   • Experiences that have shaped your view of the world.
2. Evaluate the impact of social interactions on personal identity.
   
   • Positive & negative examples with friends, family, community members, employers.
3. Explore personality types.
   
   • Personal strengths & weaknesses.
4. Identify personal values.
   
   • Define personal values.
   • Evaluate how values affect decisions and impact relationships.
   • Explore the effect of making decisions that are inconsistent with values on self and relationships.

Standard 2
Explore factors that influence personal wellbeing.

1. Examine thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that influence overall wellbeing.
   
   • Martin Seligman's PERMA model: Positive emotions, engagement, relationships, meaning, and accomplishment
   • Nutrition, exercise, sleep, resilience, mindfulness, and mindset.
   • Balanced work/life.
2. Explore the three fundamental needs outlined by Rick Hanson.
   
   • Safety: Feeling emotionally & physically safe.
   • Satisfaction: Intrinsic and extrinsic rewards.
   • Connection: Attachment to others.

Performance Skills
Identify at least 5 personal values and discuss with a peer or "potential client" how values affect our decisions, behaviors, and well-being.

STRAND 3
Students will identify and demonstrate communication and conflict resolution skills that affect personal, professional, and community relationships.

Standard 1
Identify levels of communication.

1. Superficial: low risk, low possibility for connection.
   
2. Personal: medium risk, medium possibility for connection.
   
3. Validating: high risk, high possibility for connection.
   

Standard 2
Identify communication styles.

1. Assertive: confident, direct, self-assured, positive. Clear without putting down others thoughts, feelings or opinions.
   
2. Passive: submissive, avoiding expressing opinions.
   
   • Not a peacemaker.
   • More likely to be in an abusive relationship.
3. Aggressive: forward, demanding, dominating. Without regard to others' thoughts and feelings.
   
4. Passive Aggressive: indirect, subtle, manipulative, sarcastic (veiled anger).
   

Standard 3
(Types of communication)

1. Verbal: communication using the spoken/written word.
   
2. Nonverbal: communication using body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, etc.
   
3. Digital: communication using technology e.g. cellphone, computer, social media.
   
   • Positives and negatives of communicating through digital formats.
   • Positive: quick, easy, convenient, maintain relationships, social interaction
   • Negative: technoference (technology interfering with interpersonal connections), privacy, social isolation, dehumanization, cyberbullying

Standard 4
Identify positive and negative communication strategies and practice healthy relationship communication.

1. Explore verbal patterns
   
   • Constructive: Reflective listening, timing, clarifying, validating, empathy, compassion, understanding, curiosity, being interested, softening the no, "I" statements, maintaining appropriate eye contact, non-verbal gestures, perspective taking, removing distractions, emotionally & mentally present.
   • Destructive: Interrupting, defensive, emotional withdrawal, ""you"" statements, dismissive, manipulative, blaming, dominating the conversation, distracted, character assassination, reinforcements.The Four Horsemen: Criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling, (he added a fifth - belligerence) (Gottman)
2. Examine nonverbal patterns of communication.
   
   • Constructive-Eye contact, facing toward speaker, affirming nods
   • Destructive-Tone, body position, facial expressions, distractions

Standard 5
Identify and examine conflict resolution styles and practice ways to improve.

1. Demand-withdraw pattern
   
2. Identify Gottman's Couple Conflict Styles
   
   • Avoiding (Conflict Minimizing)
   • Validating
   • Volatile
   • Hostile
   • Hostile-Detached
3. Explore Gottman's Conflict Resolution Strategies
   
   • Soften the start of the conversation
   • Describe what is happening, but don't judge (Use "I" Statements)
   • Be respectful and appreciative
   • Use repair attempts: Say key phrases to help your partner see that you are trying to understand and deescalate the conflict. For example, you can apologize, use humor appropriately, say "I hear you" or "If I understand" and so on.
4. Accommodating, Avoiding, Compromising, Collaborating, Competing (Thomas-Kilman)
   
5. Practice Conflict Resolution (Getting our Hearts Right - Humility, Compassion, Positivity)
   
   • Practice and assess effective listening in different relationship types.
   • Speaker-Listener Technique (Markman & Stanley)
   • Intentional Dialogue: Mirroring Stage, Validation Stage, Empathy Stage (Harville Hendrix)

Performance Skills
Identify previous generation communication styles and practice ways to improve communication including scripts learned from previous generations, family members, coworkers, and partners.

STRAND 4
Students will evaluate healthy relationships within families, friends, professionals, and community members.

Standard 1
Identify characteristics of healthy relationships.

1. Mutual Respect, Trust, Honesty, Compromise, Individuality, Good Communication, Anger Control, Fighting Fair, Problem Solving, Understanding, Self Confidence, Being a Role Model, Healthy Sexual Relationship.
   
2. Explore the effect of power dynamics within various relationships.
   
   • Mutual & equitable.

Standard 2
Identify characteristics of unhealthy relationships.

1. Control, Hostility, Dishonesty, Disrespect, Dependence, Intimidation, Physical Violence, Sexual Violence, Lying, Gaslighting, Grooming.
   

Standard 3
Identify domestic violence, abuse, and various sexual violations including sexual harassment.

1. Define abuse and identify physical/social/emotional/sexual/digital forms of domestic/dating abuse and violence.
   
   • Discuss threats (self-harm, suicide, blackmail) as a form of manipulation to stay in a relationship.
2. Identify characteristics of abusers and victims within the violence cycle and identify abusive behaviors.
   
3. Define sexual harassment and how to deal with it.
   
4. Define all forms of sexual abuse/assault and steps to follow if an assault occurs.
   
5. Explain the violence cycle by using examples to illustrate how the cycle promotes abuse.
   
6. Identify physical/social/emotional problems related to and resulting from rape, date rape, abuse.
   
7. Identify community resources and support groups available for assistance with sexual violations and abuse.
   

Standard 4
Explore the effects of love and intimacy in a relationship.

1. Explore the brain chemistry of love and infatuation: Attraction & Infatuation
   
2. Identify Sternberg's Triangle: Intimacy, Passion, and Commitment
   
3. Define love & intimacy
   
   • Close familiarity and knowledge of another person. Including: Self-disclosure (thoughts, emotions, preferences, values and dreams, vulnerabilities).
4. Human Sexuality in accordance with UT Code 53G-10-402
   
   • Review the male and female reproductive systems.
5. Human Sexuality in accordance with UT Code 53G-10-403
   
   • Resource for Sexual Health https://www.cdc.gov/sexualhealth/
6. Human Sexuality in accordance with UT Code 53G-10-404
   
   • Review types of refusal skills (e.g., saying "no," establishing priorities, avoiding dangerous or high risk situations).
7. Explore the most common STDs/STIs.
   
   • Bacterial infections: chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis.
   • Viral infections: human papillomavirus (HPV), herpes (HSV or herpes simplex virus), human immunodeficiency virus/acquired immune deficiency syndrome (HIV/AIDS) and Hepatitis B.
8. Explore the harmful effects of pornography on the individual and on relationships.
   

Performance Skills
Set a list of rules/responsibilities related to establishing healthy relationships that support personal values.

STRAND 5
Students will explore the functions and purposes of responsible dating and identify the aspects and importance of marriage preparation.

Standard 1
Identify the principles of smart dating.

1. RELATE Assessment: assess ten areas of the individual identifying commonalities for the couple and potential areas of difficulty.
   
   • Kindness & flexibility, emotional readiness, family background, relationship quality, effective communication, conflict resolution, sexual satisfaction, relational aggression and attachment.
   • Based on individual and relationship contexts, individual traits and couple/relationship traits.
2. List the purposes of dating (i.e., socialization, recreation, and mate selection).
   
3. List dating behaviors that support personal values and identify the personal responsibilities associated with dating.
   

Standard 2
Explore Van Epp's (RAM) Relationship Attachment Model

1. Know, Trust, Rely, Commit, Touch
   
   • Helps promote positive/healthy relationships
2. Discuss trusted networks that may provide guidance for relationships (teachers, faith leaders, family members, close friends).
   
3. Define cohabitation, the myths of cohabitation and advantages and disadvantages of cohabitation.
   

Standard 3
Discuss mate selection theories including: filtering theory, time & place theory, social exchange, complementary needs theory, theory of propinquity, evolutionary theory.

Standard 4
Discuss relationship deterioration

1. Decisions about restoring or refining the relationship
   
2. Explore Baxter's disengagement strategies
   
   • Direct, indirect, other oriented, self-oriented
   • Explore healthy and unhealthy ways to break up.
   • Avoidance (Ghosting), Relational Ruse (someone else telling them), Withdrawal support or affection, Cost escalation (make the relationship unbearable).
   • Acknowledge that it will be painful, direct and other oriented method (kind and unambiguous), avoid blaming, cut off the relationship, avoid retaliation, reflect on positive/negative learning experiences.
   • Discuss relationship cycling or churning (on again, off again with the same person).

Performance Skills
Analyze how following the Van Epp's (RAM) model promotes healthy relationships with community members, friends, family members, and co-workers and compare and contrast how RAM would be developed in those different relationships.

STRAND 6
Students will explore the transition to a marriage relationship.

Standard 1
Discuss transition into marriage adjustments.

1. Identify common sources of marital adjustments and conflict (e.g., dual incomes, finances, personal needs and expectations, religion, time management, sexual adjustments, in-laws, communication, conflict resolution, and children).
   
2. Explore marital roles and expectations (e.g., household responsibilities, child care, etc.).
   
   • Identify how roles and expectations are based on society, family, history etc..

Standard 2
Students will identify characteristics of a healthy marriage.

1. Healthy marriage model (NERMEM)
   
2. Explore Sue Johnson's Adult Attachment Theory
   
   • Partner is accessible, responsive to needs, and engaged in the process of meeting partner's needs
3. Explore Howard Markman and Scott Stanley's Research, Fighting for your Marriage.
   
   • Decide don't slide - Use intentionally
   • Do your part - Healthy YOU, changing yourself rather than your partner
   • Make it safe to connect
   • Open the door to make connections
   • Nurture the commitment
4. Explore Gottman's sound relationship house.
   

Standard 3
Explore ways to enrich a relationship through responsible actions.

1. Awareness & Support, kindness & service, gratitude & appreciation, affection & admiration, time together & shared meaning, acceptance & forgiveness, shared humor & playfulness, openness & self-disclosure, generosity & sacrifice, and sexual care.
   
2. Evaluate Vitalized, Harmonious, Traditional, Conflicted, and Devitalized Couple Types
   

Standard 4
Explore couple conflicts, conflict management strategies, effects of and coping with uncoupling.

1. Apply conflict management and problem-solving strategies to manage common scenarios of couple conflict including financial issues.
   
2. Alan Hawkins' model of divorce ideation.
   
3. Identify factors leading to uncoupling, effects of uncoupling on family members, and coping methods for dealing with uncoupling.
   
4. Identify trends, predictors and causes that lead to uncoupling.
   
5. Explore the emotional, financial, social, mental, and legal toll of ending a marriage/couple.
   
   • Consider separation, alimony, child support, and custody.
6. Identify ways to resolve relational issues to reduce the risk of uncoupling and repair the relationship.
   
   • Marriage counseling/Couples counseling healing the relationship
7. Identify the effects of divorce and coping strategies. https://www.mhanational.org/separation-and-divorce
   
   • The Aftermath of Divorce:
   • binuclear family
   • divorced mom/dad
   • former spouse relationships
   • How Divorce Affects Children, Adolescents, Adults, Families:
   • coparenting
   • negative effects
   • adaptations

Performance Skills
Apply conflict resolution and problem-solving strategies to resolve an identified common source of any relationship conflict.

STRAND 7
Students will explore family structures, cultures, transitions, crisis, and resilience.

Standard 1
Discuss differences, challenges, and strengths of each type of family structure.

1. Remarriage
   
2. Blended/Step-families
   
3. Single parent
   
4. Singlehood
   
5. Cohabitating
   
6. Married without kids: Child-free, childless
   
7. Foster families
   
8. Adoptive families
   
9. Nuclear family
   
10. Extended family
    
11. List the qualities of strong families (e.g., commitment, appreciation, decision making, responsibility, problem solving)
    

Standard 2
Explore family relationships throughout the family life cycle.

1. Discuss the stages of the family life cycle
   
2. Compare how the family life cycle changes for different family structures.
   
   • Remarried may make different paths around the cycle, paths are not necessarily linear, some stages blend together based on age of children.

Standard 3
Explore how family culture and values change throughout the life cycle and affect future decisions.

1. Intergenerational transmission theory - Transmitting attitudes, ideologies, beliefs, and behaviors through generations.
   
2. Transitional Characters - A transitional character is one who intentionally identifies unhealthy patterns, dynamics, attitudes and behaviors and proactively alters them to be healthy and productive.
   

Standard 4
Investigate the common causes of family stress, crisis and ways to build resilience.

1. Explore the ABC-X model of stress.
   
2. ACES - Adverse Childhood Experiences
   
3. Divorce
   
4. Finances
   
5. Death
   
   • List the steps of the grieving process and how to develop a positive adjustment to the many types of loss.
6. Coping methods to build resiliency
   
7. Building a support system
   

Performance Skills
Research and create a list of resources that can help a potential client with crises that may arise.

STRAND 8
Students will identify the various skills and responsibilities of parenting and list effective ways to develop meaningful relations in home and family life.

Standard 1
Discuss factors to determine readiness to become parents and potential changes in relationships.

1. Financial security, emotional security, couple relationship, social readiness, physical readiness.
   
2. Effects of human reproduction, infertility, contraception, miscarriage, still-birth, and healthy pregnancy.
   

Standard 2
Identify the challenges and adjustments to a relationship in becoming a parent.

1. Describe the changes in partner relationships that take place during and after pregnancy.
   
   • Emotional support, role changes, adaptations for family structure.
2. Explain the birth process and needs of a newborn.
   
3. Effects of newborns on partner relationships.
   
4. Define nurturing/attachment and how it impacts the parent and child.
   

Standard 3
Identify parenting styles, including positive guidance techniques that help children develop positive self-concepts, self-management, and responsibility.

1. Authoritarian: limits without freedom
   
2. Authoritative/democratic: Freedom within limits
   
3. Permissive: Freedom without limits
   
4. Neglectful/uninvolved: low limits & low love
   
5. Parenting Principles: National Extension Parent Education Model (NEPEM)
   
6. List ways to foster a child's self-concept.
   
7. Identify positive guidance techniques (natural/logical consequences).
   

Performance Skills
Create a list of individual characteristics and traits that would show readiness for parenting & apply positive guidance techniques to resolve three child-rearing problems.

Workplace Skills
Students will practice the workplace skills below as an integrated part of the strands and standards in this course.

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http://www.uen.org - in partnership with Utah State Board of Education (USBE) and Utah System of Higher Education (USHE).  Send questions or comments to USBE Specialists - Lola  Shipp or Ashley  Higgs and see the CTE/Education website. For general questions about Utah's Core Standards contact the Director - THALEA  LONGHURST.

These materials have been produced by and for the teachers of the State of Utah. Copies of these materials may be freely reproduced for teacher and classroom use. When distributing these materials, credit should be given to Utah State Board of Education. These materials may not be published, in whole or part, or in any other format, without the written permission of the Utah State Board of Education, 250 East 500 South, PO Box 144200, Salt Lake City, Utah 84114-4200.